Funny Thanksgiving Quotes
A lot of Thanksgiving days have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen. Kin Hubbard Always expect the unexpected. Right around Thanksgiving, when the new Alex Cross will be out. It's called Four Blind Mice and it's a pretty amazing story about several murders inside the military. James Patterson An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day. Irv Kupcinet Best of all is it to preserve everything in a pure, still heart, and let there be for every pulse a thanksgiving, and for every breath a song. Konrad von Gesner Christians were instructed to serve others, and the thanksgiving was for the grace of God and the fact that God offered a way for man to return to a positive relationship with Him. John Clayton Christmas is the antithesis of Thanksgiving. Christmas is pretty much a man-made holiday. John Clayton Dear Lord; we beg but one boon more: Peace in the hearts of all men living, Joseph Auslander Even though we're a week and a half away from Thanksgiving, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Richard Roeper From too much love of living, From hope and fear set free, We thank with brief thanksgiving Whatever gods may be That no life lives for ever; That dead men rise up never; That even the weariest river Winds somewhere safe to sea. Algernon Charles Swinburne Gratitude is the inward feeling of kindness received. Thankfulness is the natural impulse to express that feeling. Thanksgiving is the following of that impulse. Henry Van Dyke I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land. Jon Stewart I love chicken. I would eat chicken fingers on Thanksgiving if it were socially acceptable. Todd Barry If you think Independence Day is America's defining holiday, think again. Thanksgiving deserves that title, hands-down. Tony Snow It is now common knowledge that the average American gains 7 pounds between Thanksgiving and New Year's Day. Marilu Henner It's like being at the kids' table at Thanksgiving - you can put your elbows on it, you don't have to talk politics... no matter how old I get, there's always a part of me that's sitting there. John Hughes It's so warm now, and Thanksgiving came so early - is it just me, or does it not really feel like Ramadan? David Letterman My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. Phyllis Diller My favorite meal is turkey and mashed potatoes. I love Thanksgiving, it's just my favorite. I can have Thanksgiving all year round. Cindy Margolis My whole problem is that all of my favorite things at Thanksgiving are the starches, and everyone is trying to go low-carb this year, even a green vegetable has carbs in it. Ted Allen On Thanksgiving I will stop to give thanks that my family is safe and healthy, especially because I realize that, following the tragedies of this year, it is all too real a possibility that they might not have been. Bobby Jindal | |
men; but be careful that you do not take the day, and leave
out the gratitude. ~E.P. Powell
Serious Thanksgiving Quotes
The Pilgrims made seven times more graves than huts.
No Americans have been more impoverished than these who,
nevertheless, set aside a day of thanksgiving. ~H.U. Westermayer
If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, "thank you,
" that would suffice. ~Meister Eckhart
So once in every year we throng
Upon a day apart,
To praise the Lord with feast and song
In thankfulness of heart.
~Arthur Guiterman, The First Thanksgiving
As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the
highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.
~John Fitzgerald Kennedy
Remember God's bounty in the year. String the pearls of His favor.
Hide the dark parts, except so far as they are breaking out in light!
Give this one day to thanks, to joy, to gratitude! ~Henry Ward Beecher
Thanksgiving Day comes, by statute, once a year; to the honest
man it comes as frequently as the heart of gratitude will allow.
~Edward Sandford Martin
Our rural ancestors, with little blest,
Patient of labour when the end was rest,
Indulged the day that housed their annual grain,
With feasts, and off'rings, and a thankful strain.
~Alexander Pope
What we're really talking about is a wonderful day set aside
on the fourth Thursday of November when no one diets.
I mean, why else would they call it Thanksgiving?
~Erma Bombeck,
Thanksgiving, after all, is a word of action. ~W.J. Cameron
He who thanks but with the lips
Thanks but in part;
The full, the true Thanksgiving
Comes from the heart.
~J.A. Shedd
Thanksgiving was never meant to be shut up in a single day.
~Robert Caspar Lintner
For each new morning with its light,
For rest and shelter of the night,
For health and food, for love and friends,
For everything Thy goodness sends.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare.
They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take
twelve minutes. This is not coincidence. ~Erma Bombeck
An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.
~Irv Kupcinet
Thou hast given so much to me,
Give one thing more, - a grateful heart;
Not thankful when it pleaseth me,
As if Thy blessings had spare days,
But such a heart whose pulse may be Thy praise.
~George Herbert
The unthankful heart... discovers no mercies; but let the
thankful heart sweep through the day and, as the magnet
finds the iron, so it will find, in every hour, some
heavenly blessings! ~Henry Ward Beecher
Some hae meat and canna eat, -
And some wad eat that want it;
But we hae meat, and we can eat,
Sae let the Lord be thankit.
~Robert Burns
It has been an unchallengeable American doctrine
that cranberry sauce, a pink goo with overtones of
sugared tomatoes, is a delectable necessity of the
Thanksgiving board and that turkey is uneatable without it.
~Alistair Cooke
Ah! on Thanksgiving day....
When the care-wearied man seeks his mother once more,
And the worn matron smiles where the girl smiled before.
What moistens the lips and what brightens the eye?
What calls back the past, like the rich pumpkin pie?
~John Greenleaf Whittier
Thanksgiving comes to us out of the prehistoric dimness,
universal to all ages and all faiths. At whatever straws we
must grasp, there is always a time for gratitude and
new beginnings. ~J. Robert Moskin
There is one day that is ours. There is one day when all we
Americans who are not self-made go back to the old home
to eat saleratus biscuits and marvel how much nearer to the
porch the old pump looks than it used to. Thanksgiving Day
is the one day that is purely American. ~O. Henry
Let us remember that, as much has been given us, much
will be expected from us, and that true homage comes from
the heart as well as from the lips, and shows itself in deeds.
~Theodore Roosevelt
"So once in every year we throng
Upon a day apart,
To praise the Lord with feast and song
In thankfulness of heart."
"The unthankful heart... discovers no mercies; but let the thankful
heart sweep through the day and, as the magnet finds the iron,
so it will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings!"
No Americans have been more impoverished than these who,
nevertheless, set aside a day of thanksgiving. ~H.U. Westermayer
If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, "thank you,
" that would suffice. ~Meister Eckhart
So once in every year we throng
Upon a day apart,
To praise the Lord with feast and song
In thankfulness of heart.
~Arthur Guiterman, The First Thanksgiving
As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the
highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.
~John Fitzgerald Kennedy
Remember God's bounty in the year. String the pearls of His favor.
Hide the dark parts, except so far as they are breaking out in light!
Give this one day to thanks, to joy, to gratitude! ~Henry Ward Beecher
Thanksgiving Day comes, by statute, once a year; to the honest
man it comes as frequently as the heart of gratitude will allow.
~Edward Sandford Martin
Our rural ancestors, with little blest,
Patient of labour when the end was rest,
Indulged the day that housed their annual grain,
With feasts, and off'rings, and a thankful strain.
~Alexander Pope
What we're really talking about is a wonderful day set aside
on the fourth Thursday of November when no one diets.
I mean, why else would they call it Thanksgiving?
~Erma Bombeck,
Thanksgiving, after all, is a word of action. ~W.J. Cameron
He who thanks but with the lips
Thanks but in part;
The full, the true Thanksgiving
Comes from the heart.
~J.A. Shedd
Thanksgiving was never meant to be shut up in a single day.
~Robert Caspar Lintner
For each new morning with its light,
For rest and shelter of the night,
For health and food, for love and friends,
For everything Thy goodness sends.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare.
They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take
twelve minutes. This is not coincidence. ~Erma Bombeck
An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.
~Irv Kupcinet
Thou hast given so much to me,
Give one thing more, - a grateful heart;
Not thankful when it pleaseth me,
As if Thy blessings had spare days,
But such a heart whose pulse may be Thy praise.
~George Herbert
The unthankful heart... discovers no mercies; but let the
thankful heart sweep through the day and, as the magnet
finds the iron, so it will find, in every hour, some
heavenly blessings! ~Henry Ward Beecher
Some hae meat and canna eat, -
And some wad eat that want it;
But we hae meat, and we can eat,
Sae let the Lord be thankit.
~Robert Burns
It has been an unchallengeable American doctrine
that cranberry sauce, a pink goo with overtones of
sugared tomatoes, is a delectable necessity of the
Thanksgiving board and that turkey is uneatable without it.
~Alistair Cooke
Ah! on Thanksgiving day....
When the care-wearied man seeks his mother once more,
And the worn matron smiles where the girl smiled before.
What moistens the lips and what brightens the eye?
What calls back the past, like the rich pumpkin pie?
~John Greenleaf Whittier
Thanksgiving comes to us out of the prehistoric dimness,
universal to all ages and all faiths. At whatever straws we
must grasp, there is always a time for gratitude and
new beginnings. ~J. Robert Moskin
There is one day that is ours. There is one day when all we
Americans who are not self-made go back to the old home
to eat saleratus biscuits and marvel how much nearer to the
porch the old pump looks than it used to. Thanksgiving Day
is the one day that is purely American. ~O. Henry
Let us remember that, as much has been given us, much
will be expected from us, and that true homage comes from
the heart as well as from the lips, and shows itself in deeds.
~Theodore Roosevelt
"So once in every year we throng
Upon a day apart,
To praise the Lord with feast and song
In thankfulness of heart."
-Arthur Guiterman, The First Thanksgiving
"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest
appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them."
appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them."
-John Fitzgerald Kennedy
"Thanksgiving, after all, is a word of action."
-W.J. Cameron
"He who thanks but with the lips
Thanks but in part;
The full, the true Thanksgiving
Comes from the heart."
Thanks but in part;
The full, the true Thanksgiving
Comes from the heart."
-J.A. Shedd
"For flowers that bloom about our feet;
For tender grass, so fresh, so sweet;
For song of bird, and hum of bee;
For all things fair we hear or see,
Father in heaven, we thank Thee!"
For tender grass, so fresh, so sweet;
For song of bird, and hum of bee;
For all things fair we hear or see,
Father in heaven, we thank Thee!"
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
"The unthankful heart... discovers no mercies; but let the thankful
heart sweep through the day and, as the magnet finds the iron,
so it will find, in every hour, some heavenly blessings!"
-Henry Ward Beecher
“Praise God even when you don’t understand what He is doing.”
[Henry Jacobsen]
"Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts
with praise; be thankful unto him,
and bless his name. For the Lord is good..."
with praise; be thankful unto him,
and bless his name. For the Lord is good..."
[Psalm 100:4, 5a]
"Without Thy sunshine and Thy rain
We could not have the golden grain;
Without Thy love we'd not be fed;
We thank Thee for our daily bread."
We could not have the golden grain;
Without Thy love we'd not be fed;
We thank Thee for our daily bread."
[Anonymous]
"If you want to turn your life around, try thankfulness. It will
change your life mightily."
change your life mightily."
[Gerald Good]
Do not get tired of doing what is good.
Don't get discouraged and give up,
For we will reap a harvest of blessing at the appropriate time.
- Galatians 6
Don't get discouraged and give up,
For we will reap a harvest of blessing at the appropriate time.
- Galatians 6
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